i am still here...part of me at least

someone was asking me, why dont i update my blog more often...the crux of the matter is that i do not have much more to say and all that i wanted to say does not really matter to others, except to me.

everything that i wanted to say, has been said, all that is in my head and my heart, is already a bleak reminder of my every day...and i just want to be set free...to be given time and space to recover on my own (assuming that there is ever a chance of 'recovery') and that there is a better place for me.

i find that life is getting harder to sustain and it gets very difficult at times. sometimes i keep telling myself, that there are many less fortunate people out there...but if i dont get to cry for myself, then who will cry for me?

its strange how your life can change so drastically, not too long ago, i would be waking up to receive sms-es from the night before and would instantly be sending morning greetings. now, i dont even want to look at my mobile, cause all that i have is a blank screen. no new messages, no sms-es to send to anyone.

its funny how one can become invisible suddenly...

irony? probably. i wanted to be left alone by one group of people, but i ended up being invisible to another.